Gemintang.com : Refreshed! Every Day

Laugh is in the air !

Kategori

[-] All

[+] Sex

Pooling

G-Daily Banner
Klik Disini...

UANG 1 MILLIAR
Bukan mimpi, buktikan sendiri

BandungFood
Makanan di kota Bandung

Palugada.net
Apa lu mau, gw ada!

Advertise here

Humor

Humor yang bikin kamu senyum simpul, ketawa ngakak, sampai yang rada jayus ada di sini... Apa saja yang bisa bikin hari Sobat Gemintang yang jenuh menjadi lebih berGemintang.

Attorney & Witness - Jokes
View : 170933
Created by : Didit
There is a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan.

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one year old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh....

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on
dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh?

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for
a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law.

...Beri humor ini ke teman kamu !!!

Kategori lainnya

Suami & istri - sex
seorang istri mengeluh minta sang suami mengganti lampu yg rusak di rumah...
'emang aku tukang listrik...' elak sang suami

keesokan harinya kembali sang istri meminta suami membantunya mecuci piring 'emang tampangku kaya pembantu..'

malam harinya sekali lagi si istri meminta suaminya menggant...[View]

Bapak dan anak di mall - umum
seorang bapak n anaknya yg baru datang dari desa memutuskan untuk berkunjung ke sebuah mall... bapak yg bekerja sbg petani ini langsung terkagum sm yg namanya barang2 modern kaya tv, hp, viedo games, restoran...

ck..ck..ckk kata bapak n anak kompak saking kagumnya sama yg namanya modernisasi.

...[View]

Sialan! - sex
seorang gadis super kece dtg menemui dokter..
'dok, saya baru aja ketemu co sialan..'
'koq kamu blg gitu, coba cerita dulu..'
'saya lagi jln tiba2 dia dateng dan colek dada saya, ga ada malunya, si sialan itu kurang ajar...'
'ah itu ga seberapa, terus?' tanya si dokter yg ga kuat liat si gadis p...[View]

Asal muasal anak.... - umum
seorang anak bertanya pd bapaknya... 'pak dari mana sih datangnya anak?' Si bapak dgn sok bijak mulai bercerita..
'begini sayang, dahulu kala ada sebuah gua yg jauuuuuh sekali... gua itu kepunyaan mama mu, lalu datang lah seekor elang yg gagah, masuk dan hinggap di gua mamamu.. kemudian elang itu ...[View]

Adik dapat uang - Umum
Seorang anak berusia 5 thn melihat sang ibu yg sedang asyik masyuk dgn tukang kebunnya yg asli arab.. sang ibu kaget, malu dan langsung berbicara ke sang anak, takut ketahuan oleh suaminya.. "ini, uang ini buat adik, adik jgn cerita ke papa ya..."

Ketika malam tiba, adik kemudian melihat sang aya...[View]

1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11
12  13  14  15  16  17  18  19  20  21  22
23  24  25  26  27  28  29  30  31  32  33
34  35  36  37  38  39  40  41  42  43  44
45  46  47  48  49  50  51  52  53  54  55
56  57  58  59  60  61  62  63  64  65  66

ShoutBox