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Corporate Lessons  - Bisnis
View : 38815
Created by : didit
Old story, but still worth a second look...

Subject: Moral of the Story
Corporate Lesson 1*

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
finishing up her
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of
arguing over
which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife
gives up, quickly
wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When
she opens the
door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.

Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800
to drop that towel
that you have on." After thinking for a moment, the
woman drops her
towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few
seconds, Bob hands
her 800 dollars and leaves. Confused, but excited
about her good
fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes
back upstairs.
When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks
from the shower,
"Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor,"
she
replies. "Great!" the husband says, "Did he say
anything about the $800
he owes me?"

Moral of the story:*

If you share critical information pertaining to credit
and risk in time
with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to
prevent avoidable
exposure.



Corporate Lesson 2*

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side
of the road, he
stopped and offered her a lift, which she accepted.
She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal
a lovely leg. The
priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After
controlling the car,
he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked
at him and
immediately said,

"Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest was flustered
and apologized
profusely. He forced himself to remove his hand.
Changing gear, he let
his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again
said, "Father,
remember Psalm 129?" Once again the priest apologized,
"Sorry sister,
but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the
nun got out gave
him a meaningful glance and went on her way. On his
arrival at the
church, the priest rushed to retrieve a bible and
looked up Psalm 129.
It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find
glory."

Moral of the story:*

Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss
a great
opportunity.


Corporate Lesson 3*

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager
are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it
and a Genie comes
out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually
only grant three
wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first!
Me first!" says
the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, diving
a speedboat,
without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In
astonishment, "Me
next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in
Hawaii, relaxing on
the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply
of pina coladas
and the love of my life." Poof!

He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the
manager. The manager
says, "I want those two back in the office after
lunch."

Moral of the story: *

Always let your boss have the first say.

Corporate Lesson 4*

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A
small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and
do nothing all day
long?"

The crow answered, "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat
on the ground
below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden a fox
appeared, jumped on
the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story:*

To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting
very, very high up.


Corporate Lesson 5*

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be
able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I
haven't got the
energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"
replied the bull.

"They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at
a lump of dung and
found that it actually gave him enough strength to
reach the lowest
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some
more dung, he
reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth
night, there he was
proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon, he was
promptly spotted
by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story:*

Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep
you there for long.


Corporate Lesson 6*

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was
so cold the bird
frozen and fell to the ground in a large field. While
it was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As
the frozen bird lay
there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how
warm it was. The
dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all
warm and happy, and
soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the
bird singing and
came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat
discovered the bird
under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out
and ate him.

Moral of the story:*

1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
friend.

3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep
your mouth shut!


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